Friday, April 18, 2008

Answer: This guy



I'm scared

Love,
Chatie

Friday, April 11, 2008

Answer: Disney World

Hiya

I really, really like Disney World. I've been 5 times. I went 3 times with my family, once with a few high school friends and once with a boyfriend. I'm getting the urge to go again. Anyone interested?

I'd like to share some interesting anecdotes from some of my visits.

1. Circa 1984ish
I filmed a t.v. commercial with Goofy during my first trip there. Although I have no recollection of it, being 4, my parents took pictures and whatnot.


As the story goes, it was our first trip there as a family. We were entering the Magic Kingdom and walking through the gates, some people pulled us aside. Apparently I was the kind of kid there were looking for and proceeded to ask my parents if they could film me with Goofy. In the old Niezgoda albums there are pictures of Goofy and I sitting on the lawn, chatting it up. Now if the commercial actually aired, we don't know. My parents never saw it, but I'm still totally a star.

2. Circa 1994ish
My 8th grade teachers were not thrilled that we were being taken out of school. Now being a teacher I understand their frustration, but whatever man, I was a smart kid and they can suck it.

We took this trip around Thanksgiving and it was pretty boss. It was the first time the twins (my brothers who are now 20) were joining us. The park is next to empty around this time of the year, so we happily ran past all of the signs dictating the amount of wait time from those points.

We spent our second day at Typhoon Lagoon. We frolicked around having a jolly time for quite a while. Then, my poor daddykins, while enjoying a lovely tube ride, was spun out of control by a rouge whirlpool. Amidst this spinning, his foot slammed into the not-so-soft wall. In the end, he was left with 3 broken toes.

Watch out, man!

He had a cast put on and donned crutches. This presented many problems, as you might imagine. I must say though, we didn't have to wait in any lines. That was pretty sweet.

Not so sweet: my mom had to do the driving. Nitz has a fear of any road that has more than two lanes or one that involves merging. I think it's been like 5 years since she's even tried to maneuver the Northway. Her standard exclamation for stressful driving is, "Feel my palms!". My standard response is, "No thanks."

Anyway, my daddykins is like the king of consumers. I mean, this is the man who tried to return Christmas M&M's to CVS after Christmas because they went on clearance.

As you can guess, he wasn't gonna let Disney get away with this. He had my mom take some pathetic pictures of him standing by the pool in his cast. Then he wrote an extensive letter to Disney about how his vacation had been tainted by their ride. Disney gave us some money and some tickets, which was pretty cool.

3. Circa 2003ish

This was the trip with a former boyfriend. Of course that title is open to interpretation, because he claimed afterwards we were never in a relationship. That's fine man, but you totally scooby-dooed me with the whole meet-the-parents and a week long vacation to Florida thing.

Anyway, we spend a week down there, mostly just hanging out at his parents' vacation house (like 2 hours from Orlando). We only spend two days in Disney: the first day of the week at Typhoon Lagoon and the last two days hopping around Epcot, MGM and the Magic Kingdom.

We finished up the last day watching the fireworks at the Magic Kingdom. As the program ended, we proceeded to exit the park with the 10,000 other people who were leaving. At this point in time I lost track of him. Just use my cell, right? Wrong. I had discovered merely an hour before that Verizon, unimpressed by the lack of money I'd sent them, had shut off my phone. So ghetto, I know. I looked around for a while to no avail. Then I had to start asking people if I could borrow their phones to find him. This took a couple tries and about a half hour. He was none too pleased when we finally met back up.

This was pretty much the end of our non-relationship.




4. Circa 2008ish

I'm ready for another trip. Who's down?!

Stay classy, Poughkeepsie

Chatie

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Answer: My love for kids' books

Guess what? I like it my job, a whole lot.

I get to teach children how to read. Overall, it's pretty boss. I won't bore you with the inane details of the building blocks of literacy, but I do want to share some awesome kids' books I've encountered lately.

My favorite books for emergent readers (like mid-end kindergarten) are these sets called Brand New Readers. They are easy, predictable, and most of all, funny. I haven't met a child yet, boy or girl, good reader or struggling, who doesn't like these books.

My favorite character is Worm. He overheats easily, strives for perfection and often reaches high levels of anxiety.

Exhibit A:

Worm gets a fan. Worm is still hot.


Unfortunately the pictures didn't stretch too well. However, I hope the picture still conveys the extreme level of distress this worm is in.

Exhibit B:

"I don't like it." says Turtle. Worm paints a picture.

If you can't quite make out what's going on, I'll explain. Worm has created a masterpiece of an evergreen, which I think is pretty awesome for someone without hands, let alone opposable thumbs. Turtle shares his critique (I don't like it) and Worm clearly has a small mental breakdown. He proceeds to discard the tree painting and begins working on a new one. If you ask me, Turtle was kind of being a dick.

Anyway, that's a snapshot of the Brand New Readers. They are perfect for teaching young children how to read, and amusing the adults who have to help them.


Next, let's jump up to fifth grade/ middle school. Now I don't know how Jim Benton did it, but he somehow captured the essence of what it is to be a girl in middle school. Astonishingly enough, he makes it humorous. He does this all in the Dear Dumb Diary series.


The books' main character, Jamie, spends ample time investigating one of the most important issues one must face in middle school: popularity. The book is filled with amusing sketches and diagrams to elaborate on certain topics:






I love it, it's so perfect. By the way, Angeline is that quintessential, pretty, popular girl who is really just a huge bitch. Here's Jamie's rendition of her:



I find this pretty funny, since she bears quite a resemblance to my middle school arch nemesis. I am so tempted to put a pic of her here so you can see, but I don't want to taint my blog like that. And I am a bigger person than that. And...I'm afraid she'll somehow find it, so we're just not gonna do that.


Stay classy, Poughkeepsie

Chatie